I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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