if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
