love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
