Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
