when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
There was a lot of him and a little penis
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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