After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
