I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
