so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
