Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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