This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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