At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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