She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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