no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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