More tranny stories later!
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
