Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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