Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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