whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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