i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize