Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
