i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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