And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
