As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Also, beer. Big fan.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
