Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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