Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
This can only be settled by a dance off.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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