The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize