Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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