oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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