Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
