hotel room ftw
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize