I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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