So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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