i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
