She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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