his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
