Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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