I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
