Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
