i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
