stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize