I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
