we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
