Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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