Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
The best revenge is premature balding
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
