belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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