what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize