I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I've blown a few things in my day
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
