I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
