She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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