dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
