dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Randomize
