Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
