My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
